Surviving Complicated Grief
The hospital smells of disinfectant, trying to mask the presence of illness and grief. I walk into my husband’s room and give him a hug. I hold on tight, and even though he’s too weak to reciprocate, I relish the familiar touch and feel of his skin. How, I wonder, will I find the strength […]
Michael B
It was August of 2020, the sixth month of the pandemic. I was kept away from my grandchildren and social distanced from my kids. Every activity that gave my life meaning had been taken away. I was lonely. It was 4 years since my husband died, and I no longer had the distractions to keep […]
I Used to Be Pretty
I used to be pretty, I mean cheerleader, actress, head-turning pretty. Fortunately, I was also smart. I learned early that it would take more than good looks to make my way in the world. And as much as I’m struggling with aging, it’s harder for women whose identities revolved around their husbands, their children and […]
My Step-Mother’s Funeral
I ride to the cemetery with my stepsister’s daughter, a red-headed beauty who always makes me feel included. My stepbrother’s daughter is sitting in the back with her husband, and they are all sharing memories. Their beloved grandmother passed away 2 days ago, and although though she was 90 years old, it was sudden […]
Is It OCD Or Coping With Life?
I move the books on my wall unit, so they’re grouped by height. Am I being OCD, or is this just how I cope? Standing back to admire my work, I think, “Hmmm…I need a vase or a sculpture next to the books on the second shelf.” I try a red vase…too bright. Then I […]
Does the Soul Survive?
I’ve always struggled with the concept of life after death. Does our soul live on in the minds and hearts of those we’ve touched? Can it exist separately on another dimension? If the soul survives, is it possible to actually communicate with a lost loved one? Can they come to us in times of need […]
When Great Souls Die: Mother and Rex
Would my life have been different if my mother had lived beyond my 14th year? She was my universe, and I revolved around her like a planet orbiting the sun. It was safe and predictable, and I knew where I belonged. My mother died suddenly, after a five-year illness that was kept secret from […]